The Meaning and Symbolism Behind the Lotus Flower Tattoo

Lotus flowers are amazing and have strong symbolic ties to many Asian religions especially throughout India. The lotus flower starts as a small flower down at the bottom of a pond in the mud and muck. It slowly grows up towards the waters surface continually moving towards the light. Once it come to the surface of the water the lotus flower begins to blossom and turn into a beautiful flower.

Within Hinduism and Buddhism the lotus flower has become a symbol for awakening to the spiritual reality of life. The meaning varies slightly between the two religions of course but essentially both religious traditions place importance on the lotus flower.

In modern times the meaning of a lotus flower tattoo ties into it’s religious symbolism and meaning. Most tattoo enthusiast feel that the a lotus tattoo represent life in general. As the lotus flower grows up from the mud into a object of great beauty people also grow and change into something more beautiful (hopefully!). So the symbol represent the struggle of life at its most basic form.

Lotus flower tattoos are also popular for people who have gone through a hard time and are now coming out of it. Like the flower they have been at the bottom in the muddy, yucky dirty bottom of the pond but have risen above this to display an object of beauty or al ife of beauty as the case might be. Thus a lotus flower tattoo or blossom can also represent a hard time in life that has been overcome.

Lotus flower and peonies are also two flowers that are very popular among Japanese tattoo artists and they make a great compliment to Koi Fish tattoos. Ironically enough the two koi fish and lotus flowers can often be found in the same pond in front of a temple. The Koi fish is a symbol typically for strength and individualism.

For more information on tattoos check out the following resources. For
Custom tattoo design Design My Tattoos. For a complete tattoo resource check out
Tattoo Directory: tattoo resources and
great celebrity tattoo galleries. To read this article and other great
tattoo
articles check out the Tattoo Directory

What Divorce Parenting Practices is Best Appropriate for Preschoolers?

How do you spare your preschoolers for the negative effects of
divorce? How do you promote your preschooler’s healthy growth
and development? The answer is appropriate divorce parenting
practices.

The next question is what appropriate divorce parenting
practices for preschooler really means? Let’s keep things
simple. All you need to know is learn how divorce affect your
children. Knowing how preschoolers react to divorce will bring
you to a better position of knowing the best appropriate divorce
parenting practices you can give for your child.

So let’s get started. How is preschoolers affected by divorce?
Preschoolers commonly experience regression during parents’
divorce. Children whose parents are in conflict regress to
thumb-sucking, bed-wetting and other behaviors their parents
assume they’ve outgrown.

Children at this developmental stage may think they are
responsible for their parents’ divorce or for their parents not
living together. As a corollary to the perception that their
misbehavior caused the divorce or caused a separation, preschool
children often believe that if they are really good, everything
will be okay again. This can be an incredibly stressful
perception for a little kid, because he or she begins to carry
on his or her shoulders the burden of getting mom and dad back
together again.

Preschoolers may be confused, have fantasizes about
reconciliation, and show difficulties in expressing their
feelings. Their sense of security is affected by predictable and
consistent routines.

Preschoolers may fear being left alone or abandoned altogether
and may worry about the changes in their daily lives. They may
deny that anything has changed, or they may become
uncooperative, depressed, or angry. Although they want the
security of being near an adult, they may act disobedient and
aggressive.

Preschoolers exhibit signs of sadness and grieving because of
the absence of one parent. Preschoolers may be aggressive and
angry toward the parent they blame.

Now that you know how preschoolers react to divorce, I’m sure a
lot of ideas come to your mind on what divorce parenting
practices is best appropriate for preschoolers. To add up to
your list of ideas, here below are some of the things you should
do to help your preschoolers adjust to divorce.

Repeatedly tell children that they are not responsible for the
divorce. Children need to be reassured that the breakup wasn’t
their fault.

Discourage reconciliation fantasies. Avoid dinners, outings,
or holiday celebrations with your ex-spouse; they only fuel your
child’s fantasies. Instead, emphasize the finality of divorce

Keep daily routines intact. Children feel more secure when
there is a standard routine. Stick with bedtimes, no matter at
which home the children are. Have some consistent chores. Have
some time committed to the child, which is treated as sacred.

Reassure children that everything will be ok, just different.
Children are invariably frightened and confused by divorce. It’s
a threat to their security. Provide extra hugs and kisses and
tell your child that you and other adults will always be near to
love and protect

Explain what is happening over and over again. Children this
age are confused easily. In simple terms, explain where your
child will live, with whom, where the departing parent will
live, and who will provide care when both parents are
unavailable.

Encourage your child to talk about how he/she feels. Be
sensitive to children’s fears. Let your child know that he or
she can openly talk to you about the ups and downs of your
separation or divorce.

Encourage the child to carry photographs and other keepsakes
of the custodial parent when he or she leaves home to visit with
the non-custodial parent. Conversely, encourage the child to
keep a photograph of his or her non-custodial parent in a
visible place at home.

Be sensitive to children signs of depression and fear. Seek
professional help if depression is prolonged or intense.

Help non-custodial parent stay involve. Let non-custodial
parent maintain a regular presence such as a phone call several
times each week, messages sent on video or audiotapes.

Plan a schedule of time for children to spend with their other
parent. Be supportive of children’s ongoing relationship with
the other parent. Remember that children generally fare best
when they have the emotional support and ongoing involvement of
both parents. If you have difficulty relating to your former
spouse then get your free copy of my ebook “8 Essential Steps to
Cooperative Parenting and Divorce.” Just visit my website and
get the said ebook for free.

You can learn more divorce parenting practices appropriate for
children of any age in my ebook “101 Ways To Raise ‘Divorced’
Children to Successfully.” This ebook is a divorce parenting
guide that offers many proven ways that will not only help you
help your children but will also guide you on how to deal with
yourself and your former ex-spouse for your children’s sake.
Thus, giving you complete information on how to raise healthy,
happy and successful children even if you’re divorced. For more
information, please visit my website.

With the above information, I hope you will become an empowered
divorced parent and believe that you can raise healthy, happy
and successful children even if you’re divorce.

Copyright by Ruben Francia. All Rights Reserved.

Publishing Rights: You have permission to publish this article
electronically, in print, in your ebook or on your website, free
of charge, as long as the author’s information and web link are
included at the bottom of the article. The web link should be
active when the article is reprinted on a web site or in an
email. Minor edits and alterations are acceptable so long as
they do not distort or change the content of the article.

The changing shape of family finances

Families are becoming an increasingly complex unit when it comes
to money management. Parents are working longer hours, couples
are spending less time with each other and children are becoming
increasingly sophisticated in their material wants and
information needs. Whilst centralising funds is important in the
family, so is an analysis of the individual roles and associated
financial requirements.

Super-mums It seems that the proof of maternal efforts is no
longer found in the pudding … it’s in the spending. Women are
increasingly outsourcing personal grooming tasks and the
pressure of looking good, feeling healthy, maintaining a tight
ship and IQ level has meant that housecleaning and gardening are
again fashionable methods to promote the family brand;
housewifery is now a career, with all the attitude of 21st
century post-feminism. It emerged in a recent BBC report, that a
new type of parent was surfacing….the “manager mum”. Manager
mums tend to use the internet to save time on tasks and
streamline activity, using the Web to undertake jobs such as
grocery shopping or banking.

Once they’ve got their partner, it doesn’t seem women can relax
about their appearances, with women in relationships spending
more on their appearance than their single counterparts. UK
housewives spend a massive £5 billion on ‘keeping up
appearances’, in terms of gardening, home furnishings and
personal grooming, according to a study by Virgin Money Credit
Cards. UK women are splurging out an average of £3,488 each on
personal appearance and their home and garden. Of the £3,488,
47% is spent on the home and garden, whilst the remainder goes
on clothes, haircuts, beauty products and treatments.

The pressure to look good may be a factor in women being
labelled as the worst savers, as reported by Guardian Unlimited.
In an annual study by IFA Promotion, 63% of the women who stated
that they were unable to put aside further savings, admitted to
spending their spare cash on costly and unnecessary luxuries,
whilst 28% of women get themselves into debt with expensive
purchases. Women apparently seem to be content with spending up
to 75% of disposable income and saving less than 20%, in
contrast to men who save over 25% of their income and invest 8%.

Peter Pan fathers Whilst fathers are not physically getting any
younger, there is evidence that their mental age may be falling.
The BBC recently reported that a new type of dad had emerged -
the “gadget dad”, whilst in November last year, the Guardian
reported that men were significantly delaying fatherhood. In a
study by Panlogic, “gadget dads” love technology and have all
the latest tech toys, from Sky TV to a car navigation system.
Perhaps this love of tech toys is also the reason inhibiting men
from diverting funds to babies. According to the Guardian, 81%
of men admitted that financial fears would make them postpone
having children and if current trends continue, the average age
of men becoming fathers will rise to 40 by 2065. Virgin Money
Life Insurance also reported in their studies that new fathers
were waiting longer to start families and that UK fathers are
working the longest hours in Europe.

Savvy kids A recent investigation by Halifax found a positive
attitude towards saving is increasing amongst children. Whilst
in 1998, a third of children saved more than they spent; now
that figure is over fifty percent. The bank discovered that most
children are prepared to save for an expensive item, though
parents of younger children faced more of a struggle, as 22% of
seven to eleven year olds pestered their way towards getting
what they wanted. Piggy banks, it would seem, may become
sentimental souvenirs, as more children save their money in a
bank or building society.

This trend of ‘keeping up appearances’ seems to induce
individualistic behaviour in families, reducing co-operation on
financial issues. This erodes family values in society and
discourages future generations from investing in children.
Without the motivation to invest in sustainable communities or
even a sustainable standard of living, (currently supported by
£1.1 trillion of debt), the issue of successful management of
family finance remains trivial.

Additional information: Family finance information:
http://www.moneynet.co.uk/ Useful brochures & fact sheets from
http://www.unbiased.co.uk/website/brochures/ Random financial
ranting: http://cashzilla.blogspot.com/

A HILL OF BEANS - BAKED BEANS THAT IS

The ole West loved them and movies depicted hungry cowpokes enjoying them over an open campfire. No barbecue is complete without them and kids enjoy them, not even knowing they are nutritious as well.
So, don’t let another outdoor cooking opportunity pass by without Baked Beans. Everyone has a favorite family recipe or two handed down - keep that great tradition going.
There is nothing wrong with trying new recipes, however, or creating your own favorite into a tradition -

Old-Fashioned Beans -
1 lb. pea or navy beans, water, 2 tsp. dry mustard, dash of pepper, 1 tbs. salt, 3 onions, chopped, 1/4 cup brown sugar, 1/4 cup molasses, 2 tbsp. sweet pickle juice, 1/4-lb. salt pork
Wash and clean the beans. Cover with water and soak overnight. Drain. Add 2 cups water, mustard, pepper, salt, onions, brown sugar, molasses, pickle juice. Boil, covered, for about 1-1/2 hours. Beans should be wrinkled.
Heat oven to 250. Cut salt pork into 1/2″ cubes. Place in 2-quart bean pot. Cover with hot beans and their liquid. Sprinkle with pepper. Bake 8 hrs. covered, until very tender. When beans are baking for 6 hrs. add about 3/4 cup water or just enough to cover. Uncover the pot the last 1/2 hour.
Old-fashioned flavor and worth the wait!
************************
Boston Baked Beans -
2 cups navy beans, white beans, or Great Northern beans
1 tsp. salt, 1/4 lb. salt pork, 2 tsp. dry mustard, 5 tbs. dark-brown sugar, 4 tbs. molasses
Wash the beans thoroughly. Soak overnight in water to cover.
Add salt, stir and drain, reserving the liquid. Preheat the oven to 350. Cut off a third of the salt pork and place it on the bottom of the bean pot. Add the beans. Blend the mustard, brown sugar, and molasses with the reserved bean liquid and pour over the beans. Cover and bake for 6-1/2 hours, adding water as needed. Uncover for the final hour of cooking.
Taste and add salt if desired.
You don’t have to live in Boston to enjoy these beans.
*************************
Easy Beans -
6 slices bacon, cut into small pieces
3 1-lb. cans baked beans, 1 8-oz. can tomato sauce, 1 cup chopped onion, 1/2 cup catsup, 1/4 cup brown sugar, 2 tbs. prepared mustard, 1 tsp. salt, 5 drops bottled hot pepper sauce
Cook bacon until crisp. Drain. Combine with beans. Add tomato sauce onion, catsup, brown sugar, mustard, salt, and hot pepper sauce.
Preheat oven to 300. Bake uncovered in beanpot for 4-1/2 hours.
Some like it hot! Adjust that hot sauce to your liking.
*************************
Lazy Beans -
4 slices bacon, cut into small pieces, 1/2 cup chopped onion, 2 1-lb. cans pork and beans,
2 tbs. brown sugar, 1-1/2 tbs. Worcestershire sauce, 1 tsp. prepared mustard
Cook bacon until crisp and drain. Reserve 1-1/2 tbs. of the drippings. Crumble bacon. Cook onion in the reserved drippings until tender but not brown. Add to remaining ingredients, blending well. Place in casserole. Bake uncovered on grill with hood down for 2 to 2-1/2 hours.
Enjoy the outdoors while these beans are slowly simmering on your grill.
*************************
OUT ON THE RANGE BEANS
1 32-oz. can baked beans, 1 cup beer, 1/2 cup very strong brewed coffee, 3/4 cup chopped onion, 12 cup chopped tomato, 4 hot dogs, cut into 1/2″ pieces, 1 tbs. horseradish, 1/2 cup molasses, 1/2 cup barbecue sauce
Blend all ingredients together. Place in oven-proof casserole. Bake at 300 for approximately 2 hours, stirring occasionally. Add additional beer if beans seem to be drying out.
Great served at a campsite with all your other camping food.
****************************
QUICK BEANS
4 cans (16 ozs. each) baked beans, drained, 1-1/2 onion, chopped very fine, 1 lb. bacon, diced, cooked, and drained, 1 bottle (12 ozs.) chili sauce, 2 cups packed brown sugar
Combine all the ingredients. Blend well and place in beanpot or casserole dish. Bake, uncovered, (350) for 1 hour.
There’s nothing wrong with “quick” on a hot summer day.
***************************
SLOW COOKER BEANS
1 can (16 ozs.) dark kidney beans, drained and rinsed, 1 can (16 ozs.) light kidney beans, drained and rinsed, 1 can (16 ozs.) pinto beans, drained and rinsed, 1 (15 ozs.) can unsalted diced tomatoes, 2 green peppers, cut into strips, 1 onion, chopped, 1 tsp. oregano leaves, crushed, 1/2 tsp. ground cumin, 1 tsp. sage, 1/2 tsp. black pepper, water
Combine all the ingredients in a slow cooker. Add water to cover the beans. Cook on HIGH for 6-7 hours.
No heating up the kitchen - let your slow cooker do all the work.
****************************
Baked beans are a welcome addition to any outdoor meal. Serve them and see all the faces light up. Beans are a treat and healthy! Now that’s quite a bargain.
ENJOY
©Arleen M. Kaptur 2002 June

About the Author

Arleen Kaptur has written numerous articles, cookbooks, motivational booklets, and the novel: SEARCHING FOR AUSTIN JAMES
Websites:
http://www.arleenssite.com
http://www.Arleens-RusticLiving.com
http://www.webspawner.com/users/rusticliving/
http://topica.com/lists/simpleliving

A Valentine’s Day Story

Valentine’s Day…the day of love right? Many years ago, 22 to be exact, I was a senior in high school. Just prior to Valentine’s Day our student council representative got on the intercom during morning announcements and told us about an upcoming fundraiser.

Student council was going to sell carnations for an entire week. It was further explained that there would be three colors available: red, pink, and white.

Red was to signify love, pink said, “I really like you” and white was for friendship. The carnations could be ordered ahead of time but wouldn’t be delivered until Valentine’s Day during homeroom. The whole school buzzed with excitement over the prospect of it. Everyone discussed it but the girls couldn’t contain themselves as they wondered which lucky girl would get the most red ones. Little snippets of conversations could be heard floating through the hallways:

“I bet she will send some to him!”

“I am going to send her six red ones!”

“Do you think he will send one to me?”

“I am going to get a white one for each of my friends.”

“Do you think he will send her a pink one or a red one?”

“I wonder who will get the most?”

The conversations continued in this manner until the first day of sales. On that particular day a certain group of girls started gossiping and acting cruel. I am sure you might be able to imagine the kind of girls I am talking about as they can be found in every high school across America.

They view themselves as pretty, perfect and popular but in truth are very shallow and unhappy individuals. I had a feeling you would know what I meant! Anyway, these girls aimed their barbs towards another girl in our class. This girl was neither homely, nor attractive but she had such non-distinctive looks that she kind of just blended into her surroundings.

In fact when I really think about it, nothing about her looks nor the way she acted warranted much attention. She was quiet and to my knowledge never said anything unkind about anyone. I knew she was a good student because I sat close enough to her in a few of my classes to notice that her papers were always branded with A’s when they were handed back to her.

In voices just loud enough to be heard, they mentioned this girl by name and joked that they knew for sure she wouldn’t get a single flower. The girl just lowered her head and pretended not to hear but I knew she did. It broke my heart to witness their gross display of humor as they mocked her over and over that day and in fact, for the rest of the week. I toyed with the idea of sending the girl a white carnation but I must admit that I wasn’t brave enough. I knew what they were doing was wrong but I didn’t know what to do, so like everyone else, I did nothing.

The big day finally arrived and I was excited as everyone else but a little nervous too. What if I didn’t have a single carnation delivered to me during homeroom. I knew if that happened, I would die of embarrassment! I had ordered a white carnation for each of my friends and I was secretly hoping that they at least did the same for me. Of course there was a certain boy I was hoping to get one from too!

That day we were told that the fundraiser was a huge success and that homeroom would need to be extended so all of the flowers could be delivered. Each member of the student council was armed with carnations and they roamed from room to room delivering the blooms. I chatted with my friend for what seemed like an eternity before our door was opened for the first time.

We held a collective breath and exhaled in unison as only one flower was delivered, a white one for my homeroom teacher! The student council members continued to come in and out of our room. Our first big delivery was 4 carnations for a boy sitting to my right. I couldn’t believe a boy was the first one in the room to get red! The carnations continued to trickle in.

After receiving 3 white carnations and realizing I wouldn’t have to die from embarrassment of not getting any, my attention was drawn to the girl next to me. You know the one I mean, the smart one that the other girls had harassed all week. She sat perfectly still with her hands folded in front of her on her desk. I wondered if I should lean over and give her one of my flowers but I didn’t want to embarrass her. It was during these musings when I saw three red carnations being placed on her desk. She looked up and smiled but just continued to sit there; she didn’t even reach out and touch them! I wasn’t the only one that had noticed either; people were starting to whisper and point in her direction.

I could tell the other girls were a bit jealous because not a single girl in the class had received more than one red carnation at this point. Then things really started to get wild. Each time a student council member came in, at least one of the carnations in their stack was for her and they were all red!

At this point as best as I could tell, she had 7 red carnations stacked neatly on her desk. The class started getting a little rowdy and each time a red carnation was placed on her desk, we all cheered. OK, the boys cheered, the girls mostly just glared.

I knew I was witnessing something great and I tried to seek out the “gossip girls” just to see their reactions to this unexpected twist of events. There were three of them in our class and two of them had a few pink and white carnations on their desk and the third had a handful of white ones. I was thrilled by what was happening but I had to also wonder who had sent her all of the carnations….did she have a secret admirer?

My thoughts were interrupted by the crackle of the intercom and the voice of our principal wishing us a Happy Valentine’s Day. He went on to explain that all of the carnations had been distributed and then in his long-winded manner, thanked the Student Council for a job well done.

I heard a commotion behind me as one of the “gossip girls” got up out of her chair and ran out of the room. I heard later that one of the boys teased her about not getting any red carnations which made her start to cry. I didn’t even feel bad for her as my attention was focused on the pile of red carnations sitting on the desk next to me. What I noticed next was the smile on the girl’s face. It truly was a great day!

I don’t know for sure but I heard she was given 24 red carnations that day. We don’t know who gave them to her but I am glad someone did. I will never forget her nor will I forget that day. Oh, I did fairly well too. I received a handful of white carnations and I got a special pink one. Yes, it was from a guy, not the guy I was secretly hoping to get one from but from a great friend of mine that was hoping to make my day special. And you know what? It was special!

About The Author

If you have been inspired by my story and would like to send flowers to a loved one this Valentine’s day, please visit me at http://www.flowers-and-garden.com/valentines-day-flowers.html

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Tips for Women as They Adjust to Married Life

There are basically two types of men out there. Men who like to watch sports, and men who don’t. I consider myself lucky to have met and married a man who falls into the latter category. But that doesn’t mean that our lives together are always pure wedded bliss. It takes a lot of work, especially if you have been out in the single world for a long time.

I’m sure you single ladies out there know what I am talking about. It’s tough to actually have to live with someone when you previously had the place to yourself. And what about the name change, the finances, and all the other administrative stuff that makes marriage so unsexy?? Let’s explore what you can do to handle the transition to married life with ease.

BEFORE THE WEDDING EVEN TAKES PLACE

It is ever so important these days to have a prenuptial agreement. If he really loves you, your betrothed will understand the need for one. After all, you both worked hard for the money you earned and the assets you acquired before you were married, so why not protect them? Believe me, it’s worth a simple piece of paper now to avoid a lot of headache later. There are many highly qualified lawyers out there who can draft the agreement for a nominal fee, so put yourself at ease and sign a prenup.

AFTER THE WEDDING - NOW WHAT?

I skipped over the actual wedding, since everyone has varying tastes when it comes to wedding ceremonies and receptions, and that is not really the focus of this article anyway. I want to get right to the part where he carries you over the threshold of your new home, and you are officially husband and wife. As you start your new life together, try to keep these things in mind:

1. Take some time to enjoy being married. After all, you married this man for a reason. You should just bask in the glow of your happiness for a while.

2. Make a list of the administrative tasks that need to be handled - like the name change, joint insurance policies, etc. and give yourself a flexible target date to complete them. This way you won’t feel rushed and overwhelmed,and you will most likely complete everything ahead of schedule.

3. Decide early on which household chores you want to do, and ask your husband which he would like to do. It may seem silly, but this will help you avoid an argument later about who should have taken out the trash.

4. Figure out both your schedules - what time you go to work, when you like to work out, when you like to eat dinner, etc. It’s important to know what your day looks like, so that you can maximize your quality time together.

5. Communicate, commit, and cooperate. Don’t forget that you are a team now, and you must work together in order to keep your union strong and harmonious.

If you follow the first and last steps in the list, everything in between will fall into place. Yes, it’s tough to adjust to being a twosome when you’ve been on your own for so long. And yes, the minutiae of everyday life can sometimes bog you down. But if you can deal with it up front, organize it, and commit to working on it together, then you will succeed.

About The Author

Rachel Greenberg has a background in business and finance, and she received her MBA from Duke University in 1999. She writes fun and informative pieces for her website http://www.bargainfamily.com which she created with her husband Lee. The website provides advice and recommendations for families on various products and services for their homes, lives, and businesses.

bargainfamily@yahoo.com

Slow Shutter Speeds and Long Exposure Photography

Many new cameras will come with built-in shutter speeds of up
to 30 seconds or longer, which is enough for most long-exposure
photography. Other cameras will have a B (bulb) setting that
will keep the shutter open as long as you keep your finger on
the shutter release button or a T (time) exposure setting that
will keep the shutter open until you press the shutter release
button a second time. Cameras with bulb settings can also be
fitted with a locking cable release so that it isn’t necessary
to keep your finger on the shutter for long exposures. If your
camera doesn’t have a cable release, you can use the self-timer
option found on most cameras. This will eliminate camera
vibration from your hands.

A tripod, or something to rest your camera on, is essential
because the camera must be completely still during the time that
the shutter is open. If you want to make a fast-moving car blur
as it speeds by you, a relatively fast shutter speed of 1/20 of
a second may give you the results you are after, however, if you
want to make stars in the nighttime sky look like glowing rings
as the earth rotates, your exposure may last all night.

The light meter on your camera may not be able to accurately
judge the best aperture setting for longer shutter speeds,
especially in low-light situations, so your best bet is probably
to “bracket.” This means taking up to six pictures of the same
subject, but doubling the shutter speed each time. This will
give you a variety of effects and exposures and allow you to
choose the best shot. In general, slow shutter speeds will allow
a lot of light into the camera, which means that you will want
to use a small aperture (ie. f/22) to avoid over-exposing the
shot. In bright daylight it will be necessary to use the lowest
ISO available and a neutral density filter to cut the light down.

Some great effects and shutter speeds to try are:

Moving stars: several hours Moving cars at night: 10 seconds
Waterfalls: 4 seconds + Amusement park rides: 1 second

Planning A Baby Shower: Surefire Tips For Making Your Shower A Success

Planning a baby shower can be an extremely fun and rewarding
experience, however it is important to know the do’s and don’ts
of organizing showers before you get started. Today’s baby
showers are becoming more of a highly-organized event than they
were in the past and this article will get you up to speed.

Baby showers can make an expectant mother feel more secure in
the fact that her friends are all pulling for her and giving
moral and financial support. Usually the baby shower is
organized by non-relatives. But today, there is isn’t abnormal
to find family members, support group members, church friends
and pretty much anyone except the expecting mother.

Inviting the Guests Who should you invite? Usually, the guest
list will only include those nearest and dearest to the
expectant mother. It wouldn’t hurt if she gets a first look at
the guest list so that she can suggest who should be invited. If
you are planning a surprise baby shower, you will have to do a
little research on who should be attending instead of running
the list through the expectant mother.

If the child is not a firstborn, you may opt to keep the number
of guests down to the closest to the mother. Firstborn baby
showers tend to have a larger guest list since it is, after all,
the mother’s first time.

The thing to remember is that the nature of baby showers is
intimacy. So, for any baby shower party, try making the
gathering one of intimate friends.

You could use informal ways to invite these guests: email, phone
and others. Invitation cards and other letters are the best way,
however, as they provide a tangible, traceable evidence of
invitation. Plus, it is the most sure and formal way to invite a
person - and in many cultures - the only way.

What About the Guys The nature of the party is probably going to
tend towards the feminine side; if the organizers of the party
have a provision for this, then inviting men would be fine. It
also depends on the men, since the party may dwell on topics
such as pregnancy, children, and other motherly topics, they
might not be that excited to join. All in all, it depends on the
preference of the organizers.

Venue Anywhere! As long as it can keep with the placid and fun
nature of the occasion, any place would be fine. The more usual
places on baby shower lists are backyards, formal halls,
restaurants, and basically any room that has the amenities to
make a baby shower successful. Just make sure the venue is not
crowded and stressful to the mother-to-be. It also pays to make
sure the venue is set long before the actual baby shower happens.

When to Throw a Baby Shower Usually this is one or two months
before her due. The baby shower is the perfect time to get your
friend baby needs and stuff she may not have had time to
purchase yet. It has to be well-timed though - not too close to
the due date, and not to far as to whittle down the excitement.

Baby showers are a pleasant surprise to expecting mothers. It
takes a lot of the stress of expecting a child off of their
minds and provides a means for friends to show support and
concern (and of course, baby gifts) to expecting friends.

A properly coordinated baby shower will be greatly appreciated
and forever remembered by mothers long after they have delivered
their children.

Wedding THeme Central: Vegas, baby

Who hasn’t thought of getting married in Las Vegas at some point
or another? Whether it’s the glitz and the glamor of the city or
just the fun environment, you might want to take that and put it
into your own wedding.

And you won’t have to run off and elope to do it either. Bring
everyone with you. Blue suede shoes?

No, you don’t have to have the groom dress up as Elvis to have a
traditional Vegas wedding–although that’s not a bad idea.

You can start off the wedding plans with an invitation that
looks like a deck of cards. This is an indication of the fun,
relaxed atmosphere of the wedding. You may even want to drop in
a few real cards just for good measure.

Take the theme even further by naming all of the tables by the
various hotels and casinos in Vegas–the Flamingo, Bellagio, and
the Golden Nugget are just a few. You can have favors that are
Vegas inspired–cards, poker chips, etc.

You may want to make the ceremony look like one of the strip’s
wedding chapels. Put up a sign that says “Chapel of Love” or
something like that.

And yes, there’s more

One of the neatest ways to capture your Vegas wedding is to find
someone who can create a cake in the shape of your favorite
Vegas building. Why not have a cake in the shape of the Sphinx
at the Luxor hotel? Or perhaps you want something more
clichéd–like the old boy Elvis himself.

Although the groom may not want to dress up like Elvis, you may
want to incorporate red and black into your overall color
scheme. These are the colors of Vegas, after all. Perhaps you
can even set up small slot machines or card tables for the
night. Hire a few blackjack dealers and you’re sure to have some
impressed and satisfied guests.

Food is easy for a Vegas wedding because buffet is the way to go
in the casinos. Set up a similar food sampling, and people will
forget that they’re not in Vegas, but at your wedding.

And of course, a lounge singer is always nice, but not necessary.

Having a Vegas themed wedding is all about having fun. Perhaps
you were engaged in Vegas or just want to capture its essence,
either way, get creative and let the night be one you can bet
on.

Child Support: It’s All a Matter of Record

There is no magic solution to getting issues surrounding child
support resolved. Most parents know that when dealing with the
bureaucracy tied to the child support system persistence,
persistence, persistence is the key that opens the door.

You cannot count on case workers or case managers to do what is
your responsibility. They are overworked, underpaid, wrapped in
a sea of paperwork, antiquated computer programs, and red tape
that barely allows them to move from point “A” to point “B”. So
what’s a parent to do?

Keep your own records. When it comes to dealing with courts and
child support, it’s all a matter of record. Document, document,
document everything. If you speak to a worker, your attorneys,
the non-custodial parent, document it.

A blunt piece of advice for those who are contemplating a
separation or divorce; even if you think your relationship
appears to be on rocky ground and children are involved; start
collecting information. This is advice for both men and women.
Don’t fool yourself gentlemen; you too can become a custodial
parent seeking child support from your partner. It may not be
the norm, but it is a reality. Don’t sneak around, and don’t
feel as though you are going behind someone’s back. You have to
do what is in the best interest of your children and yourself.
Begin collecting bank account numbers, list of licenses,
locations of stock/bond papers, money markets and past
work/address history. Gather as much as you can.

Keep impeccable records. Write the names, addresses, phone and
fax numbers to everyone you talk to concerning your child
support case. Keep a photo of the parent in question. Remember,
it is all a matter of record. You must hold people accountable
and this is one way to do it. Don’t ever be afraid to ask a
judge or referee, attorney or the child support worker of your
case who they report to at the end of the day. This will send a
clear message that they will be held accountable for every word
that comes out of their mouth so it better be in your best
interest.

Parents who were married at the time of conception may not have
an issue filing for a child support order and often times your
divorce attorney will cover this matter in your initial
interview. However if the parents are not married, establishing
paternity is essential if you expect to receive child support.
Paternity means fatherhood. Establishing paternity provides the
child with a legal father.

Child support equals survival. Break-ups are never easy for the
parents or the children. It often means that the emotional and
financial standard of living for all parties will suffer.
Parents must understand that child support is paid for the well
being of the child and the parent caring for that child.

Money is a powerful tool in this society and can be used as a
weapon when it comes to child support. The duty to pay child
support and the right to visit are two different issues. They
are not connected in the law. In the eyes of the court the child
is entitled to contact with both parents. If non-support is an
issue, begin documenting the visitation and during your next
visit with the judge or referee mention the fact that support
has stopped. If you don’t have an upcoming court visit, write
the judge or referee assigned to your case. You can also inform
your child support worker if you have one assigned, but write
the judge and request a hearing to address the matter
immediately.

There is power in the pen, or in the keyboard, depending on how
you choose to communicate with the people associated with your
child support case. Always, always leave a paper trail. If you
send a letter, ask the postal worker to give you a confirmation,
it will at least let you know when the letter has arrived.

Calling child support workers or trying to get in touch with
“Friend of the Court” staff is as impossible as wining the “mega
millions lottery.” Parents must continue to write or, drop off
letters to their workers/judges, and get the name of the person
you leave the letter with, along with a phone number, This is
great advice for any situation, if you think someone is giving
you a bogus phone number, use your cell phone or a pay phone and
call the number before you leave the location. If the number is
not valid go back, ask to speak to a supervisor and let them
know; and take the information to court with you so it can
become part of the court record. If you truly have a problem
getting child support issues addressed, write your legislators
and your governor, weekly if needed. The squeaky wheel gets the
oil, and nothing ventured, nothing gained.